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Archive for the ‘healing’ Category

A glimpse into healing glory.

Posted by appolus on February 17, 2022

Twenty eight years ago, just two years after being saved and six weeks after Daniel, our son with Down Syndrome was born, I began to have difficulty breathing. After the initial X-ray, it seemed likely I had lung cancer. I had been a heavy smoker from the age of fourteen until I got saved at twenty seven. Much of that had been smoking cannabis. The X-ray was followed up with a cat scan and then finally a lung biopsy. They discovered I had a disease called Sarcoidosis. It mainly effects African Americans in this country, I later discovered I had 5% African blood in my DNA.

Sarcoidosis can affect any of the organs in the body, and in my case it manifested itself as pulmonary fibrosis in my lungs. These fibrosis are irreversible and as they begin to build up in your lungs, your lung capacity is diminished until at some point you die. A third of my lungs already exhibited irreversible fibrosis. I was told by my Pulmonologist that I was stage three of a stage four disease. There was no cure. There was, however, a treatment that could prolong your life. Very high daily doses of prednisone. IN my case, 60 mg a daily.

As Christians we understand that the more we rely upon Jesus, the deeper our relationship is with Him. Dependence is the key to the depth of our spiritual life. We often see the martyrs testify of how their relationship with the Lord grew to greater depths in the dungeons of this world. When everything is stripped away, when we lose the ability to control our own lives, then we discover that Jesus is fully in charge. As the old adage says, we have to let go and let God. The letting go part is the battle, it is the refining fire, it is our sanctification.

After less than two weeks of taking the steroids, that still small voice spoke into my spirit. “Frank, come away with me, I am your life, I am your stillness, I am your peace when all around you is falling apart, trust in me….trust in me.” I knew exactly what the Lord was asking of me, asking mind you. I was to stop taking the pills. I was to trust in Him, I was to put my life fully into His hand. As you can imagine, the opposition to this was great. My son with Down syndrome was only a few months old and had life threatening issues that would require more than one surgery. My wife was devastated at this decision of mine. She was not a Christian. Yet even Christians did not agree with me and let it be known. The pulmonologist was very angry and told me bluntly that I would die and that it would not be a pleasant death.

Several weeks passed, and the many voices seemed to be right. My ability to breathe declined. It is imperative to note that the still small voice of the Lord made me no promises, my only command was to “trust ,” Him. A well known man of God from the last century said this “Lord, may I be an ox on the altar or an ox in the field.” None of is really know our purpose here in life, what we do know is that we have been called to bring honor to the name of Jesus, regardless of our situation. Whether we live or whether we die we have been called to glorify Him. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord.

There will be times, in every Christians life, when the Lord will “make you lie down in green pastures.” You may think to yourself, what is so “Green Pastures,” about an incurable disease? I do not have the words to describe to you the place I found myself in. Enough to say that it was glorious. The warmth of the sun upon my face was indescribable. The blueness of the sky was glorious. The little sparrow sitting on the wall was altogether fascinating. I became super aware of things that I had routinely overlooked or had taken for granted. I was in this mysterious place called “under the shadow of His wing.” I had to rely upon God for every breath that I took and it took my spiritual breath away. I was not burning at the stake and singing psalms and spiritual songs, but I glimpsed into that realm.

The pulmonologist was part of a national study on this disease and had been taking X-rays of my lungs every two weeks, he wanted to chart my regression. He told me that this way, my decision would at least do some good. He was quite angry with me and never tried to hide it. One Monday morning, at 5.30am I was awoken by a call. It was my mother calling from four thousand miles away in Scotland. She apologized for calling so early, but she had been compelled by the Holy Spirit. She very simply stated “The Lord told me that He is going to heal you.” The Lord had instructed her to attend a certain prayer meeting the following night and have me held up in prayer. I find it significant that my mom was instructed to call and tell me beforehand. This was an act of faith, a “stepping out.”

As she spoke, I was overwhelmed by the Holy Spirit, I fell to my knees and in my spirit I knew that I was to be healed, I had no doubt whatsoever. I went for an x-ray two days later. The Doctor called me into his office, he seemed subdued. I had shared with him months before that I was putting my life in the hands of the Lord. He paused before flicking the lights on that would light up the X-ray and said words that i will never forget. “I do not know what you are going to call this.” He flicked the light on and pointed to my lungs, they were completely clear. Apparently the Lord does not know the meaning of the word ,”irreversible.”That was twenty eight years ago. Trusting God is the key to life. When glorifying Him becomes more important that anything else, including your own life, you will be propelled into new heights of glory.

Posted in bible, Charisma Magazine, Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, Daily devotional, Devotions, God's love, healing, healing ministry, hope, Jesus, revival, signs and wonders, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | 1 Comment »

The battleground

Posted by appolus on October 27, 2021

When I tell people that I am going home to Scotland, many people say, innocently enough, things like "oh that must be really nice, I wish I was coming with you, you are so lucky." I usually just nod and smile. How can they know that Scotland to me, in great part, is the land of my lost childhood. The land where I buried my son, where I almost lost another. Some of the darkest years of my life were swallowed up by alcohol and drugs, lost in oblivion, in the land of my birth. And yet I do love it. I love the people. I love the mountains and the valleys and the river that ran through my valley, the River Clyde. It is emblazoned upon my mind. Here below is a poem I wrote which might give you a better understanding of what it means for me to "go home." I wrote it to the fallen pieces of my heart that I left behind so long ago. I am sure many Americans could relate to this, it would just be the their own small town, the place of their birth. 

The battleground. 

I'm now going back to the battleground 
To see if the pieces of my heart can be found
I left them where they fell so many years ago
In the midst of a perpetual winter, underneath the falling snow

I want to gather them up and tell them where I've been
Of the sunshine that I've walked in and the glory I have seen
A land so far from this place, that dwells on higher ground
Far removed from the frozen land and from the battleground

And so to all the pieces that I had to leave behind
I have a brand new heart and a fully restored mind
Amidst the flame and fire of the battles long ago
Ive come to show you something of what it means to grow. 

The heart that's cut to pieces and memories departed
He came to raise you up again and heal the brokenhearted
He'll take from all the ashes, and there beauty shall be found
Where once was broken pieces amidst the battleground. 

Posted in bible, Charisma Magazine, Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christian poetry, Christianity, healing, Jesus, poetry, revival, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, The presence of God, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | 6 Comments »

Show me, Lord.

Posted by appolus on September 9, 2021

Psa 51:6  Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom. 

Part of wisdom is to know something of who you truly are. Not the way others see you or even the way you want to be seen by others but who you are in the depths of who you are. The outward appearance has no intrinsic value when it is detached from the inner reality. The only value it has is when it is reflective of the inner man. The distance between the two is the measure of our hypocrisy. We play the actor when the man that people see is not the man who truly is. They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that is true enough in the world. In the Kingdom the only beauty that counts is what God sees when He looks at us. What does God see in you?

David says in psalm 51:6 that God “makes me to know wisdom.” He is referring to the his hidden life. The inner life, the life that God know better than you. Imagine that, the only way to truth in the inwards parts is that God would reveal your inner most being to yourself. What a brutal painful journey this can be to the yielded, to the broken and the contrite. And yet, only God can do this. In psalm 51 there is a series of things God does for the broken and the contrite. Verse 14 “deliver me.” Only God can deliver us from our guilt and desires to do it. Verse 12b “Uphold me.” Only God can hold us up when the weight of sin and guilt has weighed us down. Verse 12a “Restore to me.” Only God can restore us, only God can give us the joy that comes from His salvation. Verse 10 “Create in me.” Only God can create a clean heart. Only God can cleanse the hands of those who have sinned against Him and give them a steadfast spirit in the depths of who they are.

Verse 8 “Make me.” Only God can can heal the brokenness. A healing that produces joy and gladness, a gladness that causes us to once more radiate His holiness. Verse 7b “Wash me.” God alone can wash away with the filth of this world and our flesh. Verse 7a”Purge me.” God alone can bring about the elements of my cleansing. And in the end, when we see all of this, we know wisdom. We know God. We know Jesus. And in the knowing we know ourselves in the inward parts, the hidden parts, that are to be a delight to the Lord and a light to the world.

Posted in bible, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church of england, church of scotland, Daily devotional, Devotions, Fresh Fire, healing, intimacy, Jesus, revival, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

Overcoming the darkness.

Posted by appolus on August 12, 2021

Psa 18:28  For thou wilt light my candle: the LORD my God will enlighten my darkness. 

What a wonderful promise we see here. God will light our candle. He is speaking to His own. He is speaking to those who walk humbly before Him. Who honor His word in all that they do. Who are merciful and gracious and kind. To them, He will be merciful, gracious and kind. He will honor those who honor Him. He will bring light to our darkness by reviving out spirits. This tells me many things. It tells me that God’s people get discouraged. It tells me that their candle, metaphorically speaking, can go out. And when it does it causes the darkness to press in and surround them. And yet even then, when we sense that our candles have gone out, yet shall we still honor God. Even when the darkness presses in on us from every side, we shall never deny our God. Even when we do not hear from Him, we say in our hearts ” I will honor Him till the day I die even if I never hear from Him again.

This, brothers and sisters, is overcoming. This is enduring. This is our manifestation of our own love for God and it is not conditioned upon anything. We know in our hearts that we worship God, not for what He does for us or will do for us. Not because we desperately desire to be relieved or delivered from our circumstances. Not for any other reason other than He is worthy to be praised. If this is indeed your heart brothers and sister, He will come to you in the night watches and all of a sudden your candle is lit. Your lamp explodes into light and the darkness is held at bay. The way ahead becomes clear and you you put one step in from of another and you keep walking down the narrow path. It is He alone who arms us with strength. He alone is our Rock. He alone is a shield to us and His word is always proven true. We can stand upon it and it is a lamp unto our feet.

Lord, your right hand has held me. You have armed me with strength for the battle. You give me feet like the feet of a deer and you set me on high places. You lift my spirit from the depths of the valley and you raise me up above the darkness. The Lord lives! Blessed be the Rock! May your name be exalted in all the earth. If your candle has went out brother or sister, keep on walking in faith. Keep on honoring Him. Lift Him up, praise Him, be merciful to others. Love as you have been loved. He will light your candle and you will burn again. The way ahead that has been so obscured with darkness will give way as He lights up the darkness, for even the darkness is light to our God. You will find your way forward. God bless you on your journey today and be encouraged.

Posted in Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church, church of england, church of scotland, Daily devotional, Devotions, faith, Fresh Fire, healing, intimacy, Jesus, revival, scripture, spiritual growth, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology | 2 Comments »

He tears and He heals.

Posted by appolus on August 2, 2021

Hos 6:1  Come, and let us return unto the LORD: for he hath torn, and he will heal us; he hath smitten, and he will bind us up.

The same God that brings us to our knees, also raises us up. Oh that we had no need to be broken, no need to be smitten, yet in the depths of who we are we are fatally flawed. Adam in us. In the flesh we bear the sin of Adam, we stood guilty before a Holy God. Yet in us too was a light, a smoldering ember in the depths of who we are. It speaks of our guilt. When the wind of the Spirit blows upon this tiniest of embers, the God given conscience, then it bursts into flames. “You crucified the Christ,” Peter cries out as he spoke with the power of God. Men’s hearts were rent and their blindfolds fell to the ground as they gazed upon their crime and saw that their very own sin crucified Jesus. He bore their punishment.

Imagine this. You are driving down the road and you check your phone, or you text someone. And in that split second a child runs out and is run over and killed by your car. The child is dead, and you are guilty. There is no doubt about your guilt. You are racked with that guilt. You cannot think, you cannot concentrate, you cannot live. You come before the judge and you plead guilty and you desire that he throws the book at you for you know you deserve to be punished because you killed an innocent child. Nothing can deliver you from your agony. Now imagine another scenarios, your eyes are opened by the wind of the Spirit. You see that it is indeed your sin that killed a willing and innocent Jesus upon the cross. And why was He willing? To fulfill the will of the Father that He should suffer in your stead. And in the very midst of your guilt, you “know,” that despite this, He loves you. “What must I do,’ you cry out as you heart is ripped open and you are smote with the sure knowledge of your sure guilt and the agonizing realization of His love.

“Arise in repentance,” the Lord would say “and I shall give you life”. I will bind up your wounds and set you free from the captivity of this guilt. I will raise you up from death to life that you may live. For my going forth is established as the morning and I will come like the rain, the latter and the former rain. Brothers and sisters, this is how we were saved and this is how we shall live. He still tears and He still heals. He molds us in the fires of sanctification. He scourges all those that He loves and the flesh is burned up in the fires and in this He raises us up in Holiness. Who may abide the day of his coming? and who shall stand when he appeareth? for he is like a refiner’s fire, and like fullers’ soap (Mal 3:2) He purifies His sons and daughters and purges them like gold and silver. Come brothers and sisters, let us return to the Lord.

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I commit my spirit.

Posted by appolus on July 27, 2021


In every trial there comes a moment when we lose sight of the bigger picture. We believe that we have blown it. We believe that we have chased God away and now we feel forsaken and alone. Even our Lord Jesus cries out from the cross in a moment of despair “My God, My God why has thou forsaken me.” Scripture tells us that just before this a great darkness had come across the land from the sixth hour until the ninth hour. Three full hours of what I can only assume was a satanic darkness. A gross satanic darkness had covered the land when the Father gave His Son over into the hands of His enemies. Sometimes, we can feel consumed by the darkness around us and in the midst of certain situations.

Some time later the Lord Jesus speaks His final words from the cross “Father, into thy hands I commit my spirit.” Now He was referring to His Father, a much more intimate term than God. Praise the Lord. He had went from a time of despair to a time of intimacy. And with His last breath He committed His Spirit into the hands of His Father. The answer always lies in the hands of our Father. In Psalm 31:5 we see that David makes the same cry. He is surrounded by enemies. He said that he would rest in the mercy of God and be glad because God knew about his troubles, God saw the adversities of Davids soul. He sees your troubles brothers and sisters, He sees the afflictions of your soul. Wont you too rest in the mercy of God? When we are tempted to run, then instead we must hide under the shadow of His wing.

There is no doubt at all as we journey through this life along the narrow path that we will have many such moments. Moments of doubts and moments of despair. We wonder if we have been forgotten and then suddenly we are back in the arms of our Father in heaven, glory to God. Maybe you are having doubts today about your walk? Perhaps you feel abandoned? Yet the Lord has promised His own, that no matter what kind of situation that we find ourselves in that He would restore us and heal our wounds. Even in the valley of the shadow of death we find that there are green pastures. We have been called to lie down in them. And in that place we come to realize that goodness and mercy shall surely follow us all the days of our lives, especially, in the many dark valleys that the narrow path takes us through.

Psa 31:5  Into thine hand I commit my spirit: thou hast redeemed me, O LORD God of truth. 

Posted in Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church of england, church of scotland, Daily devotional, Devotions, God's love, healing, Jesus, revival, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

Driven deeper.

Posted by appolus on July 11, 2021

2 Cor 12:9 Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
 
What drives us deeper into the arms of our Lord and plunges us into the depths of the Father’s heart? Not the delights of this world and its so called blessings but rather when the darkness comes and touches us. We discover that the light pierces the darkness and is as a lamp unto our feet.
 
Can someone who is so hopelessly lost do anything other that cry out when he is found!! When the waters of life overcome him and he is to drown and the hand of God reaches down and pulls him up. What joy, what glory! The closer the saint is to death the closer he is to life and that more abundant.
 
When he is stripped down and left naked and emaciated by this world and he is redeemed from the market place and his nakedness is covered, what absolute joy in the depths of ones soul! When by the power of God we can kiss the rod that strikes us and love the one who bears it then we know, then we absolutely know, that the power of Christ rests upon us.

Posted in Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church of england, church of scotland, Daily devotional, Devotions, God's love, healing, Jesus, revival, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

The clipping of my wings.

Posted by appolus on July 8, 2021

My wife and I know something of the pain of losing. Our first child lived only for two days. In the end it was God’s unfailing healing love that brought us through. He gives, and He takes away, blessed be the Lord as Job would say. None of that negated the pain nor stopped the tears, but it did restore my broken heart. He wipes away the tears and catches them in a bottle as a memorial. And my pain ebbed like the slow receding tide as the world continues to turn. I have a firm assurance that when this tide rises again one day, and takes me up into my eternal home, there I will see the child of my youth. The why’s of it all are really just a faint echo of the world as I lay down wrapped in the arms of the one who ever weaves this tapestry of life.

In the end I had “two” funerals for my son, Stephen. The first was on an overcast rain soaked day in Scotland, which perfectly matched my darkened closed down unsaved heart. The second would come fifteen years later, many years after being saved. It came from nowhere and broke over me like a violent thunderstorm. Thunder and lightening and a torrential rain of tears. Healing, never saw it coming. God was working His way into every chamber of my heart, and everywhere the waters of life flowed, there was healing, and there was healing for me. These are the mysteries of life and a God who works in mysterious ways whose thoughts and ways are so much higher than ours. As you ponder your own loss in this world, it is very likely that no answers will ever come as to the why. When we learn to put aside the why and live this life rather than die, then once again we shall surely fly.

Great loss is a clipping of our wings. Here is the definition of wing clipping …..”Wing clipping is the process of trimming a bird’s primary wing feathers or remiges so that it is not fully flight-capable, until it moults, sheds the cut feathers and grows new ones.” I have had my primary wings clipped many times over the years as I am sure that you have dear reader. The moulting and the shedding of cut feathers and the growing of new ones takes time and comes with its own unique pains. And then one day………we fly. We live again, fully restored. A process full of mystery and undoubtedly unique to every single person.

Posted in bible, Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church, church of england, church of scotland, consequences of sin, faith, God's love, healing, healing ministry, inspirational, intimacy, Jesus, revival, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | 4 Comments »

Birdcages made by men.

Posted by appolus on July 6, 2021

The Spirit of God is always the Spirit of liberty; the spirit that is not of God is the spirit of bondage, the spirit of oppression and depression. The Spirit of God convicts vividly and tenesly, but He is always the Spirit of liberty. God who made the birds never made birdcages; it is people who make birdcages, and after a while become cramped and can do nothing but chirp and stand on one leg. When we get out into God’s great free life, we discover that that is the way God means us to live “the glorious liberty of the children of God.” (Oswald Chambers)

There are two main types of garden in this world. There is the garden designed by man. Wonderful and regulated in its design, measured distances between flowers, well thought out patters that please the eye. And then there is the seed that has committed itself to the Wind of the Spirit which carries it and deposits it where it will, and there it springs up and flourishes in the garden of our God. The wide open fields of God’s great free life. The so called wildflowers that grows in open meadows or drainage ditches. or in the side-streets of slums or in valley floors or mountain ranges. Who knows where the wind of the Spirit shall deposit them. God knows.

So, shall you commit the seed of your life to the wind of the Spirit? Shall you surrender yourself to be taken wherever you shall be taken? Or shall you commit yourself to the hand of man? To the designs of men? To the relative safety found in regulation? One of those choices involves great risk but also results in great freedom. The other guarantees certainty and the price is conformity. Imagine a bird, designed to fly in open skies, trapped in a birdcage. What a tragedy. Guaranteed food and shelter but the cost is no flight in open skies. Maybe the one who constrains you lets you out of your cage every now and then and you fly straight to the window. There is something in you longing to be free as you gaze at open fields or eternal skies. It’s Gods calling. Are you free today or are you being called to freedom today?

Posted in bible, Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church of england, church of scotland, churches, controlling churches, deception, healing, inspirational, Jesus, leaving the church, new wineskins, revival, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

His righteousness

Posted by appolus on June 28, 2021

I thank you for the righteousness you see
For it is the righteousness You imputed to me
My chains fell of and I was healed 
When this truth to me was finally revealed

I bring nothing to His righteousness
And the Spirit of this truth has guided us
That even on my very worse day
Tis your truth alone that lights my way

Not by might nor power I stand
But by the righteousness found in thy Hand
That flows from feet and wounded side
In the shadow of thy wing is where I'll hide

This is my life tis from above
It hovers over me like a heavenly dove
This truth alone has set me free
Higher than the heavens and deeper than the sea. 

Posted in Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christian poetry, Christianity, church of england, church of scotland, God's love, healing, Jesus, revival, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | 2 Comments »

Come, swim in the depths of Me.

Posted by appolus on June 24, 2021

Eze 47:3 And when the man that had the line in his hand went forth eastward, he measured a thousand cubits, and he brought me through the waters; the waters were to the ankles.

There is a river that flows from heaven itself. It flows through our hearts and beckons us to come deeper. This river is spoken of in many places in Scriptures. It is the presence of God and it brings us deeper into the heart of the Almighty. There are trees on either side of this river and their roots are directly connected to the river and they are perpetually green, evergreen trees for the healing of the people and the nations. The river itself brings healing everywhere it goes. To be walking in the Spirit is to be swimming in the river of life.

As we see in Ezekiel 47, the Lord brings us to through the waters. Always the Lord, compelling His children to come deeper into Him. Not ankle deep, not knee deep or even waist deep but fully immersed in a river so vast that it cannot be crossed, it can only be swum in. We must give ourselves to the river, let go and give way to the current of the Holy Spirit. Whether you are ankle deep, knee deep or even waist deep, you are still standing on your own two feet. In many respects you are still in charge. Yet to give ourselves completely to the river we are no longer standing.

When we are fully given to our Lord. When we are yielded to the depths and the power of this vast river, the power of the Holy Spirit, only then can we truly be led. All resistance is gone in its depths. It is carrying you towards the sea, the vastness of God Himself. Ever closer, ever deeper into the Father’s heart. And the Lord says to to you “come, I will bring you through the waters into the deep.” “Seek me with your whole heart and I shall be found and you shall be rewarded for your diligence, I am your exceeding great reward.”

Posted in Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church, church of england, church of scotland, Daily devotional, Devotions, healing, hope, inspirational, Jesus, revival, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology | Leave a Comment »

Yesterday is gone.

Posted by appolus on June 4, 2021

It is of the LORD’S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him. (Lam 3:22-24)

Notice this verse from Lamentations 3. It is a very grave chapter where the afflicted are overcome with fears and are surrounded by troubles. Yet right here in the middle of the chapter we see our great hope. Indeed the Lord’s compassion never fails, His mercies are new every morning and great is His faithfulness. We have hope because He is our Lord. There is a tyranny of yesterday and fear for tomorrow and they are chains which are designed to drag us down.

Oftentimes the older we get the heavier the chains are because many are our yesterdays and fewer are our tomorrows. Yet, praise the Lord the antidote to these fears and these tyrannies is the now. We serve God today and we are assured that His mercies are new every morning. It is the enemy that reminds us of our yesterdays, it is the enemy that sows fears in our heart for tomorrow. And why? He wants to rob you of today. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not guaranteed. All we truly have is now. Live and walk in the Lord today and forget yesterday and care not for the morrow for Christ is in you today. Today is the day of our salvation.

If the enemy has stolen from you yesterday, do not allow him to take tomorrow as well. Awake each day and give glory to God. Our circumstances may not change but we will. Arise with the sun tomorrow morning and know that the Lord Himself directs the tides, makes the moon to rise and the sun to set. He holds it all in His hand and remember this more than anything, He holds you in His hand. You are His servant for His purposes and you are called to rise every day and seek the Lord and serve the Lord. In this is peace and from this peace springs joy and that joy, the joy of the Lord is our strength for a brand new day.

Posted in bible, Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church, church of scotland, Daily devotional, Devotions, God's love, healing, hope, inspirational, revival, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the remnant, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

He lives inside of me.

Posted by appolus on May 20, 2021

Faith, what an incredible word. Faith is the substance of things hoped for. Think about that for a moment. Things hoped for has no substance in this material world. Yet it forms the foundation upon which we stand. It exists in a realm we cannot see. Yet in the depths of our heart and the heights of our spirit we know it to be true. By this understanding we know that the Word of God Himself framed this world and every star in the night sky. The things that are seen was not made by what can be seen. It is only by faith that this can be known.

Faith is the evidence of things not seen. Think about that for a moment. It is a totally otherworldly statement. In this material world in which we dwell, evidence consists entirely of things seen. Yet in the Kingdom of God and the hearts of men, the evidence of things unseen is the entire basis for our existence. We believe in the unseen world. We believe in the unseen God. We believe in the unseen heaven and we also believe in an unseen hell.

This knowing that has been given to us, is the evidence of the things to come. The evidence of things not seen, that sentence absolutely runs counter to everything man is and knows. There in enmity between the heads of men and the hearts of the saints and never the twain can meet. There is a vast gulf between the two and it is impassable. The man who follows his head can only believe in what he can see. He will say “show me.” The man who follows the dictates of his heart and the leading of the Spirit will simply say, “I believe.”

Only by knowing God can these truths be known. It is in this realm of the knowing that we exist as saints. We walk in that realm. This is walking in the Spirit. We know what cannot be known. We know beyond the knowledge of man. There is an old song called “He lives.” The chorus goes like this…..He lives , He lives, Christ Jesus lives today He walks with me and talks with me along life’s narrow way He lives , He lives , salvation to impart, You ask me how I know He lives? He lives within my heart.

Ask me how I know He lives. You see He lives inside of me. He walks with me as the old song says. He talks with me. Faith may be the evidence of things unseen by this world but I have saw the Lord high and lifted up. I have knelt before the throne of God and all His glory filled the temple and it filled my heart and it filled my very soul. I have sat at His feet and He has taught me. I have cried out in the night watches and He has wiped away my tears. I was dead in the valley of dry bones and He raised me up. He gave me a new heart and He breathed His very life into me.

Yes, I trust Him and my hope is in Him but my hope is not like the hope of this world. My very hope has substance even although you cannot see it. My hope is Christ Himself, the Christ that dwells within my heart. The Christ that raised me from the dead. The Christ who whispers in my ear. The Christ that conquered every fear. The Christ who showed me how to die and the Christ who taught me how to fly. He is my sunrise in the morning and He is the sunset of my life. The beginning and the end and everything in between.

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And we shall bear fruit.

Posted by appolus on May 12, 2021

And the remnant… shall again take root downward, and bear fruit upward. (Isaiah 37:31)
 
In the very depths of winter, spring can seem like a long ways away isn’t that right? This is also very true for our spiritual seasons for all of us will go through dark winters of our souls. Perhaps you are there right now? I would like you to consider the tree in winter. It loses all of its foliage. It stands stark and naked and bare against the cold winter sky. There seems to be no life in it at all. Yet there it stands.
 
All activity seems to be suspended yet the root system continues to grow as the ground temperature just a few feet below the surface is warmer. In the depths of winter, the roots grow deeper. This is the season of the remnant. We are in the midst of a long winter which will only end with the return of Jesus. This long winter is by design. God is establishing a people who cannot be moved. He is allowing everything to be stripped away. All the foliage, all the pretty adornments that we have added over countless centuries are simply being stripped away.
 
The traditions of men appeal to the world, it compensates for a lack of reality. Yet God has a remnant who simply must have Him. A people who, no matter what happens, will follow God and stand upon His Word. Stand firm brothers and sisters, be encouraged. You are not alone. Your trials, your tribulations and your feelings of isolation are by design. God must have an end time people who will follow Him no matter how fierce the storm. His people must have deep roots and these roots must be developed.
 
Yes we are surrounded by a hard freeze and all things that have no depth is perishing, but be of good cheer brothers and sisters, you have depth. That depth is the Lord Jesus Himself and He gives and sustains life even in the harshest conditions. When winter finally breaks we discover the tree has grown taller because the root system with its life-giving sap has been able to focus on that which remains. Branches and leaves, the circumstances and situations of our lives come and go but the root, the very depth of who we are remains forever and it alone is our strength.

Posted in Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church of england, Daily devotional, Devotions, God's love, healing, Ignited Church, inspirational, Jesus, new wineskins, revival, Spiritual warfare, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church | 3 Comments »

This kind of love

Posted by appolus on May 3, 2021

This is the kind of love that would wait for a thousand years
The kind of love that would fill an ocean with tears
The kind of love that was birthed in heavenly places
The kind of love that shines upon a thousand faces.

This is the kind of love that would die for you instead
The kind of love that was crucified and bled
The kind of love that redeems you from all wrong
The kind of love that loved you all along

This is the kind of love that will never let you go
The kind of love that never says I told you so
The kind of love that keeps no record of wrongs
The kind of love that the birds sing in their songs

This is the kind of love that never seeks its own
The kind of love that never leaves you alone
The kind of love that forever seeks your best
The kind of love that gives your weary soul some rest

This is the kind of love that for you was crucified 
The kind of love that was broken, beaten and died
The kind of love that did all of this for you
The kind of love that covers like the morning dew

This is the kind of love that never ever fails
The kind of love that would prove itself by nails
The kind of love that is crowned by a crown of thorns 
The kind of love that will weather all of your storms

And in the end it is love that shall remain
It opened every door and has broken every chain
That you may live for all the world to see
That as a child of God the Son has set you free

This kind of love sets my heart aflame
This kind of love heals the blind and the lame 
This kind of love means you shall never be the same
It is time to fall in love.

Posted in Christian poetry, Christianity, church of scotland, Daily devotional, Devotions, god, God's love, healing, hope, inspirational, Jesus, new wineskins, poetry, revival, spiritual poetry, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, The Psalms, the remnant, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

The kind of love that yields

Posted by appolus on May 3, 2021

(Rom 6:6-7) Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin. For he that is dead is freed from sin.
In the emptying process He removes the stones and rocks and the clods from our hearts and refines the flesh. The desires of this world loses all of its allure as He draws us to Himself. If we yield to the process then He draws us closer. I would love to say that in my experience it has been a one-time yielding, but no, not so simple. Time and again the calling comes. The deeper and the closer we come, oftentimes the deeper the cut. Shall we yield to the surgeon’s knife? Shall we yield to the sculptor’s chisel? I would say that only a vision of heaven itself could draw us to such yielding. It is not just a matter of revelation, inspiration is a vital aspect of our relationship with the Lord.
Just one moment in His presence. Can a single moment ruin us for the things of this world? Is it possible that after that moment the world turns to black and white? Then another miracle happens. As we begin to look at the world through those captivated eyes, the color begins to return but it’s not the color of the world, it’s the color of heaven. Now one truly sees the sunset because one has been intimate with the artist. I can see a waterfall and my spirit soars because I know the hand that crafted it. The mountains raises me up to higher places, to the place where they were born. The stars in the heavens draw my eyes upwards and my spirit follows the path of my gaze and I find myself in higher places. The hand of a child, a single ray of sunshine through the clouds, a wave that crashes onto the shore, soon enough I see my Lord in all of it. I see His beauty everywhere.
Yet the darkness prevails and time and time again it comes against the light. Yet, out of that moment, out of His presence there is born an eternal longing that no darkness can quell just as no hand could hold back the tide. He comes. Yes and He comes again to those who would wait upon Him. How long shall we wait? However long it takes. This is the kind of love that would wait a thousand years. The kind of love that would fill an ocean with tears. The kind of love that was birthed in heavenly places. The kind of love that shines upon a thousand faces. And so we yield, and so we die to this world. And we are drawn ever closer to the next until the day comes when we step over into the world that has touched us and called to us.
There is glory in all of it. It is a grand tapestry and we are but a thread. Can we see the vision of the artist? Can we see the vision of the sculptor? It is not so important to see the vision of the artist or to see the finished sculpture, it only really matters that we see Him, Him who creates it all. And in seeing Him we see everything in a single moment. Now with eyes that have gazed upon the Master we see it all so differently. Have you seen Him? Can you see the world through the eyes of Him who made it all? It’s a glorious vision and it continually draws us.

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The plateau of peace.

Posted by appolus on May 2, 2021

Recall the conception that you had of holiness before you stood, by the grace of God, where you stand today. It was the conception of a breathless standing on a pinnacle for a second at a time but never with thought of being able to live there. Yet when the Holy Spirit brought you there, you found it was not a pinnacle but a plateau, a broad way, where the provision of strength and peace comes all the time, a much easier place to live that lower down.

The security of the position into which God brings His saints is such that the life is maintained without ecstasy. There is no place for ecstasy and manifestations in a normal healthy spiritual life. The emotions that are beyond the control of the will are a sign that there is something not in the secure position, something undisciplined, untrained. (Oswald Chambers-Biblical ethics)

Brother Oswald just said a lot. And it would be worth just re-reading it a few times to see where he is coming from. It is in the context of the will and what part the will plays in our lives. If the emotions rule the will, or over-rule the will then there is a problem. Emotions are wonderful things and I fully embrace them. Yet, more often that not, they are like the waves of the sea driven by winds that we cannot see. The ocean becomes broiling and heaving and destruction is never far from hand in the midst of this kind of sea.

So brother Oswald contrasts a pinnacle to a plateau. A plateau or a Mesa. A mesa is an isolated flat topped elevation or ridge which is bounded from all sides by steep hills or rock faces and stands distinctly above a surrounding plain. It stands above the plain. It is not so high as a pinnacle, but it is still high enough to separate it from its surroundings while still in the midst of its surrounding. You cannot last long on a pinnacle but you can live on the broad plain flats of an elevated plateau.

Jesus is our plateau. When our eyes are upon Jesus then we are elevated above the noise and the din and the waves of the roiling sea. Peter discovered that it was not good enough for Jesus do walk upon the water, to be elevated above the storm just for a moment, we were born from above to occupy the high ground. And our focus on Jesus is the answer. Consider these things from Scriptures that describe Jesus. He is our High Tower. He is our Rock and our Fortress. These are all places of deliverance. The righteous run into these places and they are safe.

Can you say that you live above the fray of your emotions? What wind drives you? The gales of insecurity and fears? The hurricane force winds of disaster and persecution and loss? Or are you driven by the wind of the Holy Spirit? Do you stand upon the plateau, the broad place that elevates you above the storms of the plains below? You will notice that Chambers is talking about the way that our lives are “maintained.” The everyday life. He is not denying that people have emotions or that even men and woman can have ecstatic moments in their lives, but he describe them as pinnacles as opposed to plateaus.

The Lord Himself said in John 14 that He would not leave us as orphans but rather He would send us the Holy Spirit. He begins the chapter by addressing the troubles that we would undoubtedly face in our lives. “Let not you hearts be troubled.” And again in verse 27 He says ” Let not your hearts be troubled, neither be afraid.,” because “my peace I give unto you, not as the world does.” Jesus gives us His peace. His peace is our plateau. It is quite apart from anything the world has to offer and it is very much apart from the troubles of this world.

If you find yourself without this peace brothers and sisters, then look up. Look up into Jesus. Come away with Him above the troubles of this world. He has prepared a place for us, not just in eternity, but now, it is the plateau of peace. It takes discipline and obedience and trust to climb the high walls that lead to this place. It is not for the faint of heart and it is not for the nominal Christian, whatever that means. The will, your will, must yield to His will and you must trust Jesus implicitly.

Every foothold is a victory. Every ledge is a place of rest. Looking up and not looking down is a must. Who will find themselves scaling these heights? Who among us will master their emotions by the power that the Lord has given us? When we come to this place we will find that the emotions have found their proper place. The broad place of God’s peace that surpasses all understanding gives us standing on a firm foundation, on the Rock, upon the mighty fortress of our God. High atop the high tower in the midst of the plains for all the world to see. In it, but not of it. This is our place saints, this is our place, this is His peace. Journey on my fellow pilgrims.

Posted in Christian, christian living, Christianity, church of scotland, discernment, God's love, healing, inspirational, intimacy, Jesus, new wineskins, revival, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, the remnant, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

Slowly starving in the silence

Posted by appolus on April 29, 2021

As Jesus faced down Satan in the desert he told that old liar that “It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.” Every word brothers and sisters that proceeds forth from the mouth of God. Man needs bread to live, he has to eat otherwise he will slowly starve to death. What a ghastly sight it is to see someone in the latter stages of starvation. They lose all of their characteristics and begin to resemble one another as they waste away and gauntness takes over. As we sit in our pews week after week, no one dares disturb the sound of silence.

Despite the richness of our gifts and our callings, despite our ability to give and receive words of knowledge, to hear heavenly songs sung in a heavenly language, to hear prophecy’s and exhortations that can speak directly into the heart of what we are going through in the moment, we dare not disturb this established silence.Have we made a neon god? Do we sit in pews and worship a god of our own making? A god that has to dim the lights and break out the ice making machine to create an “atmosphere,” that was long ago lost to slick professional worship teams and men with programs.Listen brothers and sisters, if entertainment brought them in, only entertainment will keep them. Yet how long before they grow weary of the entertainment? Where do they go after the dimmed lights and the religious concerts fail to move them and the smoke dissipates?

If we could see with spiritual eyes as we sat in our pews and looked around, would we see well fed people living on the fat of a land flowing with milk and honey, living abundantly in the life of Christ, edified and well fed? Or rather would we see a people gaunt with hunger, starving for the Spiritual edification that the Lord Himself provided for us. He promised us that He would not leave us as orphans but send the Holy Spirit to lead and to guide us. What happens when the Holy Spirit is silenced and men have decided that they know best?

Mar 7:9 And he said unto them, Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition.

Is this what we have done brothers and sisters? No longer can we have the Lord speak to us how He pleases in the midst of the congregation. We have rejected these gifts so that the traditions of men may be kept and we now must not disturb the sound of silence, that silence being the words and the wisdom of man. And in the midst of that darkness we sit, only ever wondering what the power of God truly looks like, and the smoke slowly drifts away.

Posted in Charisma Magazine, Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church of scotland, delusion, discernment, end times, faith, false teachers, gifts of the spirit, God's voice, healing, heresy, inspirational, intimacy, manifest presence, new wineskins, pentecostal, praise and worship, revival, spiritual gifts, Spiritual warfare, testimony, the crucified life, the deeper life, the persectuted church, The presence of God, the remnant, The State of the Chuch and Manifest presence, the state of the church, theology, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

The boy with the broken wing.

Posted by appolus on April 26, 2021

It has been almost seven years now since our grandson was taken from his mother and given to our family. He was a very broken child when he came to us. Have you ever tried to help a bird with a broken wing? It panics and is freaked out as it sees you hand approach. It cannot possibly know that you are driven by love and compassion until your hand closes tightly, not too tightly, around him and he is safe in your hand. This was what it was like when Mason first came to us as a little five year old. The power of the Lord is felt in the power of His love. His ability and patience to take that which is broken, and heal it, is truly supernatural. Here is a wee poem I wrote about that.

The boy with the broken wing.

You were a bird with a broken wing
A nightingale that could not sing
A frightened broken bird that had no choice
Little bird, who has stolen you voice .....I hear your cries.

Can't you see, can't you understand 
Come to me, there is healing in my hand
I will hold you and never let you go, 
until your wing is healed and love begins to flow

You may have broken this little birds wing
Yet you will hear this little bird sing
Love has put him back together
And he will now be whole...forever

A beautiful bird that love has made whole
You only ever took from him and stole
But he has risen with the morning sun and now he sings
And flies for all the world to see with two beautiful wings

I see you flying son and I can hear you sing
And to the depths of my heart it is such a beautiful thing
Touched by the Hand of God and made complete
Now fly where eagles fly and sing your songs so sweet.

Posted in bible, Charisma Magazine, christian blog, christian living, Christian poetry, Christianity, church of scotland, Devotions, gifts of the spirit, God's love, healing, intimacy, Jesus, poetry, revival, spiritual gifts, spiritual poetry, Spirituality, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, The presence of God, the remnant, Uncategorized | 5 Comments »

Glorified obedience

Posted by appolus on April 26, 2021

1Jn 2:17  And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever. 


Imagine you are crossing a great river. The world is on one side and you are headed toward the other side, the heavenly side. Each time you are obedient, each time you turn your back on sin, another stepping stone appears before you and you move forward towards your goal. One step at a time on the road to glory. It is by obedience that we make forward progress towards a deeper walk with the Lord and we overcome.

Now, there are two main categories of obedience. One is a legalistic obedience and the other is glorified obedience. Brokenness, submission, surrender and love must be the building blocks of our obedience. If we simply try to be obedient without first taking these steps, revealed to us through the word and the Holy Spirit, we will discover that there is an obedience that binds us in chains and the weight of these chains will drag us down and drown us. Yet, obedience born out of love and a desire to please the one that we love frees us and fulfills us and propels us on.

Glorified obedience, one motivated by love and awe of a righteous holy God and a revelation of Calvary is like the watering of a tree. There can be no fruit produced unless that tree is watered by the living waters of obedience. Striving to be obedient without the fruits of brokenness will lead to a desert landscape in which nothing can live. The motivations of our heart, the seat of our affections that sets our eyes upon Jesus and the Holiness of God takes us from glory to glory.

Posted in bible, Christian, christian blog, christian living, Christianity, church of scotland, Daily devotional, Devotions, God's love, healing, intimacy, Jesus, religion, religious, revival, sanctification, spiritual growth, Spirituality, the crucified life, the deeper life, the gospel, the persectuted church, the remnant, Uncategorized | 1 Comment »