Twenty eight years ago, just two years after being saved and six weeks after Daniel, our son with Down Syndrome was born, I began to have difficulty breathing. After the initial X-ray, it seemed likely I had lung cancer. I had been a heavy smoker from the age of fourteen until I got saved at twenty seven. Much of that had been smoking cannabis. The X-ray was followed up with a cat scan and then finally a lung biopsy. They discovered I had a disease called Sarcoidosis. It mainly effects African Americans in this country, I later discovered I had 5% African blood in my DNA.

Sarcoidosis can affect any of the organs in the body, and in my case it manifested itself as pulmonary fibrosis in my lungs. These fibrosis are irreversible and as they begin to build up in your lungs, your lung capacity is diminished until at some point you die. A third of my lungs already exhibited irreversible fibrosis. I was told by my Pulmonologist that I was stage three of a stage four disease. There was no cure. There was, however, a treatment that could prolong your life. Very high daily doses of prednisone. IN my case, 60 mg a daily.

As Christians we understand that the more we rely upon Jesus, the deeper our relationship is with Him. Dependence is the key to the depth of our spiritual life. We often see the martyrs testify of how their relationship with the Lord grew to greater depths in the dungeons of this world. When everything is stripped away, when we lose the ability to control our own lives, then we discover that Jesus is fully in charge. As the old adage says, we have to let go and let God. The letting go part is the battle, it is the refining fire, it is our sanctification.

After less than two weeks of taking the steroids, that still small voice spoke into my spirit. “Frank, come away with me, I am your life, I am your stillness, I am your peace when all around you is falling apart, trust in me….trust in me.” I knew exactly what the Lord was asking of me, asking mind you. I was to stop taking the pills. I was to trust in Him, I was to put my life fully into His hand. As you can imagine, the opposition to this was great. My son with Down syndrome was only a few months old and had life threatening issues that would require more than one surgery. My wife was devastated at this decision of mine. She was not a Christian. Yet even Christians did not agree with me and let it be known. The pulmonologist was very angry and told me bluntly that I would die and that it would not be a pleasant death.

Several weeks passed, and the many voices seemed to be right. My ability to breathe declined. It is imperative to note that the still small voice of the Lord made me no promises, my only command was to “trust ,” Him. A well known man of God from the last century said this “Lord, may I be an ox on the altar or an ox in the field.” None of is really know our purpose here in life, what we do know is that we have been called to bring honor to the name of Jesus, regardless of our situation. Whether we live or whether we die we have been called to glorify Him. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord.

There will be times, in every Christians life, when the Lord will “make you lie down in green pastures.” You may think to yourself, what is so “Green Pastures,” about an incurable disease? I do not have the words to describe to you the place I found myself in. Enough to say that it was glorious. The warmth of the sun upon my face was indescribable. The blueness of the sky was glorious. The little sparrow sitting on the wall was altogether fascinating. I became super aware of things that I had routinely overlooked or had taken for granted. I was in this mysterious place called “under the shadow of His wing.” I had to rely upon God for every breath that I took and it took my spiritual breath away. I was not burning at the stake and singing psalms and spiritual songs, but I glimpsed into that realm.

The pulmonologist was part of a national study on this disease and had been taking X-rays of my lungs every two weeks, he wanted to chart my regression. He told me that this way, my decision would at least do some good. He was quite angry with me and never tried to hide it. One Monday morning, at 5.30am I was awoken by a call. It was my mother calling from four thousand miles away in Scotland. She apologized for calling so early, but she had been compelled by the Holy Spirit. She very simply stated “The Lord told me that He is going to heal you.” The Lord had instructed her to attend a certain prayer meeting the following night and have me held up in prayer. I find it significant that my mom was instructed to call and tell me beforehand. This was an act of faith, a “stepping out.”

As she spoke, I was overwhelmed by the Holy Spirit, I fell to my knees and in my spirit I knew that I was to be healed, I had no doubt whatsoever. I went for an x-ray two days later. The Doctor called me into his office, he seemed subdued. I had shared with him months before that I was putting my life in the hands of the Lord. He paused before flicking the lights on that would light up the X-ray and said words that i will never forget. “I do not know what you are going to call this.” He flicked the light on and pointed to my lungs, they were completely clear. Apparently the Lord does not know the meaning of the word ,”irreversible.”That was twenty eight years ago. Trusting God is the key to life. When glorifying Him becomes more important that anything else, including your own life, you will be propelled into new heights of glory.